Wednesday, June 27, 2007

obituary


A friend sent this to me this morning. I thought that it was pertinent to the RE market. After all, it is a lack of common sense that has driven Vancouver RE to such heights that it requires 68-odd % of the median income to buy a median home in Vancouver. Mixer mortgages, etc.

I will leave you now, that I may spend the day in lament.

My parents told me about Mr. Common Sense early in my life and told me I would do well to call on him when making decisions. It seems he was always around in my early years but less and less as time passed by. Today I read his obituary. Please join me in a moment of silence in remembrance, for Common Sense had served us all so well for so many generations.

OBITUARY: Common Sense

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair, and maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not children are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer Aspirin, sun lotion or a sticky plaster to a student, but could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar can sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by three stepbrothers; I Know my Rights, Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm a Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing.

Author unknown

6 comments:

Real estute said...

That's good.

Anonymous said...

“Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses”

I find it ironic that common sense has convinced us that unicorns and leprechauns do not exist, yet the author believes that an imaginary friend created and controls the universe (not to mention the nonsensical stories about zombie Jesus, flying Jesus, etc.)

He may also want to familiarize himself with the actual facts of the "McDonald's coffee case", as I’m sure common sense would tell us that serving scalding hot coffee in styrofoam cups to people in cars will inevitably result in at least one party getting burned.

solipsist said...

"unicorns and leprechauns do not exist"

They don't? Oh, my.

I was sorely tempted to redact that piece so that it just mentioned not to buy what you can't afford and "Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.", but there would have been little left, and, I don't have good brain function in the AM.

Anonymous said...

>...but there would have been little left, and, I don't have good brain function in the AM...>


That's OK, Sol, You're doing a good thing; just by being here.

Real estate aside, you're a cool guy and you can certainly bank on that :)

solipsist said...

"Real estate aside..."

Why, you are making me blush, but I have a feeling that you are my wife, or my sister.

Well, maybe my sister.

Maybe Babby Sol buttering me up for the car keys.

Mrs. Hairy Woman said...

Excellent ...